We just returned last night from a fantastic vacation up North with our family. We gave a little party for my folks' 50th wedding anniversary. We were each asked to give a 5 minute speech. It was a sweet opportunity for a family with good parents, but I knew my other siblings would say most of the mushy stuff. Here was my script:---
If you know my parents, you know that they’re always reading. When I think about my parents, about growing up in their home, about their marriage, about seeing them together now, that’s a major picture in my mind. I see Dad reading in his recliner and Mom beside him.
I heard a statistic recently that children’s performance in school can be directly related to the number of books in their house. According to the study, it didn’t necessarily make a difference if the parents read directly to their children or if their children simply saw their parents reading. If that statistic is true, I should have been a valedictorian. I saw my parents read a lot.
They read the newspaper: they get the local paper every day, and the New York Times because one paper wasn’t enough
They read magazines: their coffee table has strong legs, which is good, because the coffee table books on the table are covered in magazines.
And, books, always books. Mom keeps an enormous dictionary, atlas, and several bibles in her cabinet by the kitchen table. Dad has a bookshelf behind his recliner in the livingroom, and always one or two books on the side tables and on his bedstand.
When my parents visit, they devour anything printed that we have in the house. They read the parts of the newspaper I never get to, and they skim all our magazines. One time before they came to visit, I bought single issues of a variety of magazines I thought they would enjoy during their stay. I still think it was a nice gesture, but those magazines evaporated within minutes.
Recently, Mom looked at my bookshelves and asked what my favorite books were and what they were about. I named a few, but also had to admit that many books on our shelves are there for show.
Let me make a few main points:
1) When I started writing this speech, I was afraid that the topic wouldn’t come across as very romantic, for an anniversary speech after all. However, reading the newspaper together every morning, and sitting in the livingroom together every evening for fifty years, while children look on, is a romance I look forward to catching up to with my wife and my own family.
2) My Dad has always read enormous biographies about profoundly important people: presidents, statesmen, entrepreneurs. Some books have taken him years to digest. Only occasionally has he told me what he learns about those individuals. However, his habit of reading has taught me that people can do great things that are worthy of writing in books that are big enough to read for a very long time.
3) I’ve often seen my parents read the Bible. My mom with her reading schedule and all her pens, and my dad secretly in his study on Sunday mornings. This has been a persistent reminder for me of the habit of faith, and the wonder of never tiring of the one true Book.
4) Another literary habit my parents share is writing – Mom with her commentaries and Dad with his journaling. Their writing is very private – I’ve never read it. Their private writing reminds me that their marriage is still personal and intimate, with meaning that only they know between them.
I’ve heard it said that reading books allows you to live more than one life, as you share in the experiences of others. My parents have lived more experiences than most people I know, and the books have always been trying to catch up. Now their books are leading them on new experiences, from visiting Anne of Green Gables in Prince Edward Island to the world of CS Lewis in Cotswold, England.
I’ve been able to experience my parents and their marriage while they read their books. Sometimes, I secretly think the books merely provide a way for my parents to be together. Reading allows them time to not say all the things that after fifty years don’t need to be said. And, I also know that reading is a recreation they built through years of economy and responsibility, from times when going out was too expensive and when four kids were kept at home.
So, Mom and Dad, happy anniversary! Thanks for teaching us to read and for letting us watch you read. Thanks for teaching us about the world and faith and about others, as you learned yourselves. More than that, and this is my point, thanks for letting us see you always together.
